She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
