Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Please don't give away my fajitas
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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