Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize