I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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