i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
