Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize