I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.