All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize