You can't special order awesome
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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