It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
