It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Randomize
