Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
