how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
high people should be assigned attendants
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
