is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
