shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
