Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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