Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
