She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize