Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I have feelings that need drinking.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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