ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
we're making bets on your personal life
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
