Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
