hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize