The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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