do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
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