Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize
