I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
