People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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