I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize