Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
