Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
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