so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
