so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
