i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
