I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize