There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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