i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
