erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
