you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
