Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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