he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize