i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
