And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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