Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
