shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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