So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize