I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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