i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
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