would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
