You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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