Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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